perjantai 6. lokakuuta 2017

Avalon photoshoot vol.2... At school!? (1/?)

Oh yes.

During the autumn we had a photoshoot session at school - I modeled and my classmates practised photographing & advicing the model.
This is going to be a long photospam but I hope that you'd check the pictures since my classmates truly deserve that. They're very talented in both photographing and photo editing. I truly enjoyed working with them. <3

The costume I wore was Avalon since the campus area provides perfect backgrounds for this character.

NOTE: I know that this version is a lot like a certain fan art. I would've worn different lenses but, for my great sorrow, all my other pairs of lenses had dried up (except the ones I got from my friend but I can't wear them for many hours) and I wanted to wear lenses with the make-up I had decided to do, so... Yeah. :/

But let's go on with this post!! <3

First the pictures by Picair! <3
Pictures: Picair
Photo edit: Picair 






 Photos & photo edit: Kaisa Hyvärinen






And the last picture to the photo spam!

Photos & edits: Jaakko Pöntinen


There are so many pics that I really can't put all of them in just one post... :'D Had I done that this post would've been a bit too long - but this only means that there are other photospams coming up! Stay tuned~!

-Firith 

keskiviikko 4. lokakuuta 2017

A (hopefully) short break.

Hello!

I guess that you've noticed that I've been quite silent here. I have a few reasons for that:

1) During the summer I was working - that's why I didn't have time or energy to update this blog.

2) My computer broke and when I finally got it back from my uncle (who kindly fixed it) I noticed that this thing had updated Windows 10 by itself. The picture editing program is HIDEOUS. I really need to do something for this quickly.

3) After many long years I'm finally a student again!! Not in any of the universities, mind you - almost got into the university of Oulu but in the end I didn't manage to do that. At first I was quite pissed since I had been waiting for moving to the north but since the plan A didn't work I decided to go for plan B. The result: nowadays I study at Eurajoen kristillinen opisto (The Christian School of Eurajoki, though it doesn't have that much to do with religion these days, it's just the name) to become a web designer!
(And I'm quite happy that I didn't move to the north - some very nice and happy things have happened during my silence here.)

So, most of my time is spent at school nowadays. That's why I haven't updated this blog after... The NärCon cosplay plans... Ooops.

I'm not likely to write a summary of NärCon - there's not much to say since it was the most hectic and stressful con I've attended by far. But I promise to post a picture spam when I have time! :)
I also have some new photoshoot pictures of Avalon and there are a couple of lens reviews I should publish at some point.

But, anyway, I'll be back~! <3

(And I have some cosplay plans for 2018 so I'll write WIP posts too~!)

See you, hopefully soon! <3

-Firith

keskiviikko 26. heinäkuuta 2017

NärCon Sommar 2017 cosplay plan(s?)!

Hello~!

I'm sorry about my silence here but, once again, I've had problems with my internet connection. You see, I had to buy a new phone and for some reason my computer doesn't accept its connection, neither hotspot nor USB. :/ I'll become more active when I get some technology which actually works...

But, to the business itself!

I decided to attend NärCon for the first time this year.
And my wallet is already crying. Traveling isn't cheap - especially when you first travel from Southern Finland to Northern Sweden and from there to Southern Sweden... x___x

Right now the only confirmed plan is this mister - yes, I've made a new cosplay!

Lord Cob from Tales from Earthsea.
Ghibli villains, anyone? <3
Actually this started as a joke between me and Shiro Samurai - I just said that I could cosplay this character, just for laughs. At some point this became a real plan and... Well, now I've almost finished this costume... xD

I'll cosplay Lord Cob at least on Friday. I'm still not sure if I'll cosplay on Thursday - we'll see about that!
On Saturday I won't cosplay anyone because, well, I'll be leaving Linköping for Stockholm in the night between Saturday and Sunday (since I have to be at work on Monday morning, more specifically 7 o'clock :D).

lauantai 24. kesäkuuta 2017

Circle lens review: TheDollyEye Lucidae Green

Hello~!

And I'm sorry that my blog has been so dead again for a while... *deep sigh* I haven't been able to work on my cosplays at all because, well, I go to work five days a week and my shifts have been at least 10,5 hours long so... Yeah. My eyes have been very tired too - when I've tried to put circle lenses in them it has felt like someone tried to cut my eyes with a knife. :I

But I managed to get pics for this one - let me introduce you TheDollyEye Lucidae Green circle lenses~!

Note: I got these lenses from a friend who doesn't wear any fancy/unnatural looking contact lenses anymore. These lenses were expired when I put these into my eyes (I only took the pics, I don't want to destroy my eyes any further) and that's why it's impossible to grade the comfort. Thank you.

Let's get started!

(The first three pics © Shiro Samurai, thank you very much!) 


The vials of the lenses.


The lenses in their vials.


Base curve: 8,6 mm
Diameter: 14,5 mm
Water content: 42 %
Life span: 1 year

Inserting these was quite easy - these didn't curl around my finger or anything. I didn't even feel them in my eyes as much as I had expected to feel them! o__o 
After opening the vials I let these soak in a new solution over the night since the original solution (in the vials) irritates my eyes a lot. I have no idea if it does the same to you but I definitely don't recommend testing it. 


One lens in to show you the enlargement.
Well, these are not very enlarging but I have to say that I wouldn't wear these for any cosplay anyway; in my opinion these would go for different alternative styles, such as goth and punk rocker. In other words: if you want to cosplay a moe character, don't pick these lenses. 

Can't say anything about the comfort, really :/ 

I fell in love with the design the instant I saw these - the first two words that came into my mind were "mystic" and "magical".  There are darker and lighter shades of green which make these lenses look very lively and vivid. The spiderweb-like black decorations boost the magical look of these beauties~
The black limbal ring isn't that thick but I think that it's better the way it is. I'm not quite sure if this kind of design would work for the "moe eyes" lenses.
The color blends quite well with my natural light eye colour (grey/blue/green) - even though my natural eye colour shines through quite clearly in some lights. In most lights these look clearly green though (why do I think about forest?)! 


But now, lens photos~!

These were taken by me in May during a sunny evening.
Close-up photos aren't edited in any way.

Outdoors, facing the evening sun.

Outdoors, back against the light.

Indoors, bathroom light.

Indoors, under the fluorescent lamp.

Indoors, natural light through the window.

Indoors, with a flash.

Indoors, yellowish light. 
From a distance.


  • I would rate the color 8/10 - very lively and beautiful green~! 

  • The design is 10/10 - I just love these kind of lenses! <3 The design makes me think about mysteries and magic. 

  • The opacity is 8/10. In most lights these are clearly green, in some lights my own eye colour shines through quite clearly. 

  • Can't grade the comfort.

  • The naturalness is 5/10 - I mean, how many people have spiderweb-like details in their eyes? :DD The colour, however, looks quite natural, and the lenses aren't too enlarging.


I'll try to become more active in this blog again - there's just the problem called "I have no time"... Well, I decided to start to work on a quite simple cosplay - wait for the WIPs and circle lens reviews~! ;) 


Got any questions? Ask in the comment box, contact me on social media or send me an email! 

-Firith

lauantai 27. toukokuuta 2017

Gijinkas I'm likely to make in the future!

The title pretty much tells it all.

I have a shitload of cosplay plans - and these gijinkas are a part of them. I've begun to order stuff for some of these already but I sincerely have no idea when I will debut these. Hopefully in the near future, even though Sannan-san and Yang Jinghua are my priorities right now.

But let's see what this list contains~!

Darkrai from Pokémon: The Rise of Darkrai
Yes, I've been planning to re-make this one ever since I made my first gijinka of this character. I was never pleased with it; I made it under a huge stress and, unfortunately, one can clearly see that I wasn't doing my best.
And back then I wasn't even sure what kind of a gijinka I actually wanted to make...
But yes, this is 100 % sure to happen in the future. I've loved Darkrai as a character ever since I saw the movie and I really want to cosplay this character again.



Yveltal from Diancie and the Cocoon of Destruction
I watched this Pokémon movie not so long ago and when I saw Yveltal I got the "I must make a gijinka of this Pokémon!!" feeling - and yes, this will definitely happen! It might not be my priority number one but still.
I haven't planned the whole costume just yet but I think that I pretty much know what kind of a gijinka I want to make.
Black and red Pokémons ftw.




Qurupeco from Monster Hunter 3 Ultimate

NOOT NOOT MOTHERFUCKERS.
I pretty much lost my mind when I tried to hunt this one - really, it's not even that hard yet I still managed to spend way too many hours on trying to kill Qurupeco. Such hunter skills, much wow. :I

But yeah, when I got over my hate towards this monster I actually took a closer look at it - and realized that I liked its colors a lot. I've always loved and respected the element called fire too and after a few discussions with my hunter friends I decided to make a Qurupeco gijinka. I've already ordered stuff for this one.
Waiting for those feathers to arrive. :DD
This one will be one of my most expensive costumes by far, I know it already... Bye money, didn't need you anyway.


Kyuubi from Naruto
Because why not?
Naruto was one of the first series I got into when I stepped into the cosplay community. This demon fox has had a special place in my heart ever since. I mean, who wouldn't love an intelligent devil in disguise?

Kyuubi is extremely intelligent and independent character... And quite destructive, too. For some reason these kind of characters attract my attention quite easily.

I've already ordered some fabric for this one too and I've begun to think about the ways to make the tails. I have no idea when I will debut this one though but I hope that I'll manage to do it during 2018 - I have a feeling that making this during this year is highly impossible.



Alduin from Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
"Zu'u Alduin, the first born of Akatosh!"

This villain dragon is pure gold. Even though he isn't that much of a challenge to kill (if you time the kill right) and he is one of the stereotype villains, there's still something special about him... And not just the fact that he's a massive dragon.
I'm still going to make Cicero someday but right now I have a feeling that I'll probably make Alduin first.

And hey, look at that design - it's going to offer me so much new challenges! <3

(By the way, I still can't get over the fact that Alduin's dragon brother Paarthurnax and Super Mario have the same voice actor...)


There they are, some gijinka plans! :)
I really don't know when I will debut these ones but let's just say that I don't have that many plans for 2018 yet (except for re-making Ayame and making Ritsu but yeah)... x)

See you soon~!

-Firith

tiistai 23. toukokuuta 2017

Circle lens review: G&G Shinny Violet

Hellooo~!

Okay, this is my first time reviewing violet circle lenses - G&G Shinny Violet! These go by names G&G Puffy 3 Tone Violet and Barbie Puffy 3 Tones Violet also~
So, my first experience with G&G lenses wasn't very nice - G&G Natural Brown lenses caused me quite vulgar-looking bloodshot. And, sadly, these beauties aren't much better. I think that it's because of the bigger base-curve though; I didn't notice it before I had already ordered the lenses.

But now, the review~

The vials of the lenses.

The lenses in their vials.

Base curve: 8,9 mm
Diameter: 14,5 mm
Water content: 38 %
Life span: 1 year

I didn't feel these at all when I inserted these; they were actually one of the most comfortable ones I've put into my eyes during the time I've reviewed lenses. Well, when I did my make-up I sometimes felt a small sting when the lenses moved in my eyes but it was nothing too bad. 
After opening the vials I let these soak in the new solution over the night since the original solution (in the vials) irritates my eyes a lot. I have no idea if it does the same to you but I definitely don't recommend testing it. 

One lens in to show you the enlargement. 
Okay - moe eyes, that's what I thought when I inserted the first lens. These are more enlarging than I expected (according to the diameter). 

These have pretty much the same story than the other G&G lenses I own. These felt quite comfortable for those 4-5 hours I wore these but at some point they suddenly felt very dry and scratchy. When I took these off my eyes were bloodshot, once again. Remember: my eyes are quite sensitive and it seems like the lenses which have a base curve bigger than 8.6 mm are not suitable for my eyes so it might be one of the factors why these lenses felt uncomfortable in the end. Anyway, these didn't blur my vision as badly as my G&G Natural Brown lenses did. Actually I was able to see properly for the whole time. Not afterwards though.

The design of these lenses is quite beautiful in its own simple way. There are a few (I think that I spotted four) different shades of violet in these lenses and in the middle, surrounding the iris, is a brown asymmetric ring. I think that the ring surrounding the iris is there to help the lens color to blend with the natural eye color - which, in my case, doesn't happen since my eyes are a mixture of grey, blue and green (in other words: my eyes are light-colored). These look like they were designed for darker eyes but the design works pretty well in light eyes too! 
The limbal ring is semi-thick and it's colored dark grey, not black, For some reason I like that - black grey suits these lenses better. The design itself looks quite natural...

...meanwhile the color doesn't. Even though in some lights these look more grey than violet, they still look quite unnatural. 
The color is pretty lively thanks to the different shades of violet and these aren't as unnatural as some other lenses are (read: these don't have "I edited the color of my eyes on Paint" effect). These lenses aren't that pigmented either; I don't know if it's just me but I can see my own eye color through these quite easily. 

Some lens pictures! 

All of these © me during a sunny day in May.
Pics aren't edited in any way. 

Yellowish light.

Indoors, with a flash.

Indoors, natural light (gazing through the window).

Under the fluorescent lamp.

Bathroom light.

Outdoors, facing the sun. It was quite hard to keep my eyes open, sorry...

Outdoors, back against the sun.

From a distance.


  • The color is 7,5/10. It's vivid and beautiful violet - yet in some lights it has greyish shades. If you want "NOTICE ME I'M VIOLET" type of lenses, these are not for you. 

  • The design is 8/10. Pretty basic design, but the small details I mentioned (for example the brown asymmetrical ring) make these look lively. 

  • The opacity, in my opinion, is 7/10. In some lights it looks like my own eye color shines through a bit and, of course, it shows in the middle. Mainly the opacity is quite good. 

  • The comfort, sadly, is 3,5/10. The bloodshot was there once again, these felt very dry after wearing these just for a few hours. At least these didn't blur my vision as badly as my other G&G lenses have done by far. 

  • The naturalness is 2/10. The design is quite natural but hey, who has violet almost moe eyes by nature? :D 

  • The enlargement is 9/10. These make my eyes look quite huge, even though the diameter isn't that big.

And there it is, another (non-sponsored) circle lens review! ^__^
I'll try to become more active here again - I've actually bought fabrics and other stuff for my Keisuke Sannan cosplay and I have pretty many lenses to review (...and con summaries to publish, I'm almost two months late with those and three months late with one Krav Maga post...) so stay tuned!

By the way, got any questions? Ask in the comment box, send me an e-mail or contact me on social media! 

-Firith

perjantai 12. toukokuuta 2017

"I can't cosplay him if I don't get thinner!" - in the clawing grip of anorexia nervosa

This day's post is, indeed, quite heavy and speaking about this topic isn't very easy to me. I've made a video about this a few years ago but since I'm not very active in YouTube I decided to write about this - maybe someone who fights with same kind of things finds some help here. Remember: if you want someone to talk to, my contact information can be found from the "How to contact me" site on my blog.

And, at first: this post is from my point of view. I don't mean that bigger-sized people wouldn't be good cosplayers or couldn't make good costumes - damn it, I've seen a lot of bigger cosplayers who are absolutely fantastic and way better than I am. This is basically a story how a sick mind works and terrorizes itself.

2012

I had just gotten into cosplaying - and, almost immediately, I bumped into this topic: is person X valid to cosplay the character Z, if the person is bigger-sized than the character? In my opinion it was - and is - okay to cosplay a character which isn't the same size than you are, but back then I was very cruel and criticizing towards myself. I have never been, and I will never be, a thin person.

But back then I thought that I would have to lose weight in a maniac speed to be able to cosplay Sasuke Uchiha.

And so I begun my project of losing weight!

Taken in 2012 before I begun losing weight.

I think that I had a healthy base for my project in the beginning of it; I just ate smaller meals, decreased the amount of candy I was used to eat and exercised more. Yep, I changed my way of life to the healthier direction!
...except that all of it escalated rather quickly.

I had no memories of these messages but my friend reminded me about these:

A friend: "Are you feeling okay, you looked a bit sick today?"
Me: "Yeah, I have a small fever... Anyway, I have to go out for a walk so it might take some time for me to answer you."

...it was December 2012. There was a snowstorm going on outside and it was fairly cold. I had a fever. I went out for a walk - and did that two times because I just had to.
Guess if I had eaten basically anything during the day?
If you answered no, you're correct. I had already stopped eating proper food. If I saw it, it made me nauseous. Basically I ate just a few fruits during the day and almost immediately after eating I had to exercise because I "felt the fat level increasing in my body". Well, of course that can't actually happen, but... A broken mind is broken.

I quit visiting my friends - I had to exercise.
I quit attending relatives' birthday parties - there might be cake and I HAD TO exercise.
My brother begun to put some of his own food onto my plate because in his opinion I ate too little.

But I lost weight and, in my own opinion, begun to look like a decent human being.
I lost 17 kilograms in less than a month and a half.

Okay, I know it's derp but I don't have better pictures from those times... I wore (and still wear) clothes that are too big for me.

I never looked like a skeleton. People usually think that if someone has anorexia the person must be very, very thin. But I wasn't. Yes, I got thinner but I was never a skeleton-like being. But I don't even want to know what I did to my intestines, for example my kidneys.
I'm also quite a good example of the fact that anorexia nervosa is a mental illness which just has physical symptoms. The main Hell happened inside my head.

In the end someone told me that I should seek for help. I don't really remember who it was but I think that it might have been Gure. At first I was quite resistant - I was okay! I was healthy! I was thin!
Then I had to contact the psychiatrist for other reasons (yes, I went to a psychiatrist since back then I stressed about everything so much that it affected my mental health and not in a positive way) and I happened to mention that I had been living like that for a while.
My healing process begun from that moment - but the battle was still not over.

2015

27th of December, my 19th birthday. 
I hadn't been eating for the past few weeks basically at all - the food, once again, made me nauseous. It had happened again, the illness had developed itself slowly but surely again. 
I went to Rauma with my father and little brother. 

Those two hours we spent there were hellish. 
I shook, I almost fainted and vomited, my pulse was way too fast. I was pale as fuck, I was sweating and I couldn't breathe properly. I was quite sure that I was going to die. And it wasn't a panic or anxiety attack, I can tell you that. 
And it happened again two days later. I was supposed to travel to the north for New Year's Eve but I cancelled it and said that I didn't feel too well. 
I was too weak to even walk properly. Not to mention training or running. Nope, even rising up from the bed felt very, very bad. 

After that I begun to eat. The urge to vomit was always there, I didn't want to swallow - I just had to. And day by day I ate more and more until I finally reached the level called "normal". Trust me, it took me a lot of time...

This was taken during that healing time. And I'm starting to think that I should cut my hair again, lol.

Nowadays I'm on a diet which purpose is to develop my muscles - I train four times a week so I didn't want to just to lose weight. 
But nowadays I eat. A lot. And quite often. 
In a healthy way. 

It's not easy to get out of the claws of anorexia - I had it going on, more or less, for three years. And mostly it was because of cosplay. I'm not even kidding you. 
I didn't want to be labelled as "the one who is too big to cosplay anyone". 
Note: I'm not actually blaming the cosplay community. Eating disorders are just a symptom of a mind being sick - it all starts with it. But bullying (in school) and reading about the "who can cosplay and whom" topic didn't have a positive effect on my mind. 

I almost got myself into the hospital with this illness. 
I was waiting for the day I could count my ribs. And, every now and then... I still do. I just have to be strong - I can't let myself slip back to the old, damaging ways. 

This could have killed me. 
The worst part is the fact that at some point I begun to dream about dying - at least I could be the handsome skeleton then. 
Anorexia nervosa isn't a trend or a joke. It affects thousands of peoples' lives even now. It's one of the most common eating disorders in the world. It's definitely not a joke - people die because of it. And, had I not been strong enough to break its hold, I would've been one of them.
And even though I got thinner, it didn't make me happy. I never looked at myself like "wow, good job" - no, every time when I saw myself from the mirror I thought "there's still too much fat, I can't eat today either". So yes, being thin and losing weight might not make you happy. 

There's also a lot bigger reason behind all of this but I'm not actually ready to talk about it just yet. Someday, yes, maybe in the near future too but right now it's too much.

I have forgotten things from those years, I know that I don't remember everything. Maybe it's okay. Maybe I don't have to remember everything.
This post was everything but easy to write, really. But I'm still happy that I managed to do this - this is one of the ways how I deal with this thing. I'm pretty much healed from this sickness by now, and trust me: I'm very thankful to my friends who told me to get help. Without them I might not be here writing this blog post.

Everybody, take care of your friends, your family etc.

(A random make-up test for my OC Duante.) 
See you next time.

-Firith